Summer

I know summer is supposed to be fun under the sun, but why is it called the slave drive break?

It's because most of us in the work world know that teens and college students come home and want jobs for money during their school years. They work and work and see the summer pass.

Why did it have to go? What fun is that? Why cant adults have summer breaks too? The world wouldn't turn.

I know that we all enjoy time off... but why do we need to consume it with work? I don't want to.

No one does.

So don't.

Dorm life

I know that this seems dumb, but I wanna blog about what it's like to live in a dorm.

It seems this place is like a club jail cell mix... the walls are cold cenderblocks, and the windows are unbarred, but the confinement is so jail like. Stuck in your room for extended amounts of study.

It's crazy.

I love my suite family though... Adam and Austin are amazing and the whole experience is cool.

I know that I want a roommate next year... It's been so lonely this year and I can't seem to spend time studying and I think a roommate will solve this problem for me and make me want to stay in for a while to study.

Dancing coming to a close for 2010-2011 school year

I've had so many ups and downs, summer will be a relief for me. I will see my family again, I will work my bottom off. I will let the stresses of school roll right over. I will sit down breath, and read. I intend to keep in contact with all my good best friends from here over the summer, and plan on coming back next year ready to roll with the punches again.

I want to thank college for a good freshman year, first and most importantly, I survived it. (almost didn't) So for this I thank you. :)

Second: I want to thank college for helping me live again, I felt like I was in a rut for soooooo long at home. I needed the escape, I needed to be the dancing guy. I needed to laugh and feel my soul again, to experience, to live and to survive, to know.

Third, I want to thank college for helping me find who I am. I am not the same. I am no longer Randall Neil Cole Jr from Glencliff Comprehensive High School. I am Neil Cole, the flaming, happy, gay, the individual that is now and for ever more comfortable with who he is and this is me. Now for the first time, I will say, I am me and you don't like it, don't ask me to change, It won't happen.

American Puzzle: Why College Students Cheat

American Puzzle: Why College Students Cheat: "'To me, the idea of trying to track down custom papers and identify cheaters, that's not as productive as understanding why 200 people, one..."

I'm tired of chasing, but I do it anyway.

I know this seems stupid, I know this seems redundant. I know that I don't deserve it, and I know that it's not worth it.

I love hard.

I love everyone. I love like love is supposed to be. I make it count until you deserve my love no more. I know how to please, how to make peoples day, how to make you happy, how to bring you ever lasting joy, until you're my boyfriend or you piss me off.

I cut you off, leave you be because you can live without me, right?

Why do I care? why do I need to please?

Pure and simple, I love to love. It makes ME happy making someone else happy.

It may seem like I'm trying to strangle you with me, but I'm just wanting you to love me enough to notice, and help me, perhaps love me back the same, maybe?

Man vs. Women

Man vs. Women:

Man:

Bronze smart, physically able, loving capable, emotionally unstable, @SS holes, simplistic in thought.

Women:

Book smart, physically able, loving, emotionally wantingly unstable, b!tches, and complex in thought.

Winner?

Both, they both have flaws, men just have different flaws then women and vice versa.

Magic Powers

I wish I had some powers... the powers I would love to have would be as follows:

   1. Mind reading

I would love to know what people are thinking. my world would be so much easier to control if I knew thoughts.

   2. The power to change free will

I would want to make people be kind to everyone else and everyone would treat everyone kindly in my "ideal" world. :)

I know these two powers don't seem like they should go together because why listen to what people think if you plan on changing how they think? well by listening first I know others opinions.

Grades

School is like a giant zit. You just want to pop it and get rid of it.

But unfortunately it sits there on your face like a sign reading "I'm still here B@#CH!"

No matter how much you pop it, and empty the puss that fills the sack, the pimple on that face will fill right back up until the semester ends and the body of summer and no stress comes.

So what to do till it heals?

Keep popping. Don't let it build up too much, or it will become so big it kicks it's self out of school.

The power of God

I think it's amazing that I can dance through hail and get hit by only two pieces of hail.

How do you make someone love you?

You can't make someone love you. Even today, it's getting harder to make someone stay with you. The incentive is no longer there. The drive to make things work and not give up on this fragile aspect of life.

I'm honestly tired of looking for love. I can satisfy ALL of my desires with friends and "best" friends.

Why even look for one. I have a desire to share my feelings for one person who I care for deeply and never want to loose. I have fooled myself many times.

I can't find him.

Cars

I have been wanting to write about this topic for a while now, and the car that most interests me is the

1995 Camaro z28 T-tops Blue, preferably still stock. (but if I had one, I wouldn't complain)

This car is a symbol, one that is so relevant to today's America.

Most of which have reached almost retirement age... with over 160 thousand miles, the engines of these beasts are coming to an abrupt stop for most. The ingenuity is running out.

The country is in a land slide to foreign made cars and newer aerodynamics. It's sad really how such beauty can go to the dumps.

The whole idea and body and make up could describe the American innovation. The aerodynamics of the car represent the time defying awe and beauty that still lasts today.

The treads seem to have lost there umph and the drive train has over driven it's 100 thousand mile warranty. Possibly suggesting that our idea of "being the best" is 60 thousand miles over a new American idea that needed to be checked then and replaced with a new one. Maybe Washington should find a new American Camaro to replace the beautiful legacy instead of letting its spirit die.

A little confused

I don't know whether to strip my bed and start packing or just relaxing on this break.

Seems like relaxing is getting me into trouble. So packing it is. I will pack for school, working on clothes all week, packing homework, start first thing now, and finally

Pack to move. Looks like gigs up and the loser is the one who lets this whole thing ruin their lives first. I caved the minute the word fell from my mothers lips. Looks like I'm the loser don't it?

Don't know what I'll need so a spot in granny's basement is calling my name... Don't wanna come home in three weeks to find my stuff ruined, broken, or missing... I atleast need to get my personal items that mean the most to me out of this emotional wreck of a family's reach.

Let the dust settle, and see what remains. what ties to my past, what friendships lasted like the flag that was still there.

My constant struggle to be the good guy.

Wow, what a shitty day. I'm so done with the whole divorce thing...

boring...

honestly there's less tension at granny's for goodness sake. I know what it's like to be on the hurt end of a relationship... trust me, It's not easy. {for all who don't know sometimes it can get a little hairy at granny's... (O the aggravation) but it comes no where near close to the drama.}

 I tell Sarah,my sister, that me and Christa and mom and them were going to see Harry Potter (number 6, I believe) so everyone would know where we were. Apparently word didn't make it past her ears.

So anger built and tension rose, but for no reason. We honest to goodness were just in a small miss communication error. Sitting peacefully in a theater with 20 other Harry Ron and Hermione fans just waiting for the plot of revenge that was stewing at home without us even knowing.

Tail bones

I have a tail bone... It likes to make itself known every once and a while. Now that I think about it we all have one and mine just happens to be making itself known to me in the form of unbearable pain that has left me nearly bed-stricken for the rest of the evening. I have been music deprived for nearly three days and it SUCKS!!!!! What a way to start off Spring break, yeah?  Nonetheless, I'm thankful for my good friends that bring me food and offer to clean up my messes. Where would I be without them? Oh I know... right where I am now, stuck in the bed and in utter pain, but maybe it'll get better or maybe it won't. All in all, I will try to bear through it, carrying my aching tail bone with me. So on the topic of tail bones, how is yours?

It serves no purpose but as a reminder that we are all humans from time to time.

Reading

Someone once told me that you become a better reader by reading.

"How?" is all I could say, how could someone become a better reader by reading... didn't make that much sense to me. Until I realized that reading is just like riding a bike or flying a kite or anything that you get better with practice.

It seems like reading would just come to you, like you would one day just go "poof" and you could read for hours and finish multiple books because your IQ just magically increased. Well I'm here to say that reading is just like any other sport or piano, it's a tool that with sharpening, can cut the air.

I challenged myself to this, I read and read, and I have been reading much faster, and with much more ease, I don't know why reading perfects reading, but the phenomenon still occurs.

For me it was like, " you have an hour and you need to read four chapters. so I had to learn to read, and retain, and it took a while. but I made it."

The power of Life

We would all love to see a day when we can do what we never could before...

For me that day was today, I made new friends and lived for me... I made my own way and didn't live for someone else. Why would we want to live for someone else anyway? They always let us down. They never put the same amount of effort into you as you do them. So I challenge all those clingies to be a little less clingy tomorrow.

My heart

How can I feel so much for nothing... literally? I feel the world for a persona I portray on someone else... It's really sad. Why can't this persona stay?

Is it creepy to want to love something that is bigger than one person? Why can't the other person love too? why does it seem like I always have to be the only one to bend at all?

Do they not understand that my heart breaks after all the constant bending? It is worn and stretched too far, over used and under appreciated.

Men

Does anyone fully understand Men? I know that I don't. I am a Man and I still don't get me sometimes. I feel as thought I am the break through of the barrier of Man vs Woman. I.E. the tape from the break-up... It looks so innocent, and very worn from the movement of the sheets... the one thing that connects his world with hers... and how it still manages to function is crazy. I can be easily worn down, and tired from thinking with both perspectives.

Thinking like a Woman is logical. Thinking like a Man is easy. Is either one better? No, just different. Is either one hard to understand? No.

It's when you cross the two, things get hairy. Either brushes fly across the room, or during sleep his chest is waxed.

Most Men or Women can not see the respective opposites (if you will) point of view. In the world a lot of us want to keep it this way.

I am living proof it's not going to.

Million Dollar Jackpot

Who wouldn't love to win the lottery? The question most asked is "what would you buy first?" I'm here to tell you that this answer is never preordained by our selves. We may daydream about what we want but chances are this isn't our first purchase.

I guess what the true question should be, is if you could get anything in the world that you wanted with money, what would it be?

Even this question is not a good one, because there is always an asshole or two who'd say "world domination" or Asia. Laugh out loud.

So to refine it one more time, the question should be, What material possession do you value most?

When I stop to think about it, I value a LOT of objects in my life. I may value the helicopter, or the jet, or the home greatly when it comes to possession, but when it comes down to it, I need more than a car to live.

When someone talks about the quality at which one lives, he or she is referring to the quality and style of all the tools of life which one person comes in contact with collectively.

When someone asks me what would I buy first, I think, "what purchase would make my quality of life increase the most?"

For most, quality of life is what makes them look good in society. For me, this is what would make me happier and at the same time better off in life.

So the next time someone asks you, what would be the first thing you'd buy, think about your Wal-mart list, and what's most important on there.

Candles

We sit on a shelf and crack, retaining the essence that was put into the glass or metal jar that contains the wax which with flame changes form to burn off in a Chemical Reaction. I wait for the life of the welder to spark the love between hand and life. As the first contact of the new found flame touches my wick and starts to boil from the start of combustion, tip downward, my heart from then on can no longer burn that minute piece of my essence.

Many candles would agree, that once touched with flame you never want to burn out. That the love of the welder will live on as the flame grows and slows.

Sadly, the candle is sometimes put out by the welder, and stored. Either to one day be lite again, or to be sold to a new welder, or eventually found in the garbage. The candles all agree that it is better to be lite once and put out, than to have never been lite at all.

Nail Polish

How can you ware finger nail polish? It's a scar on the nail or a crack in the skin that makes us cover it up. Is nail polish really one of those tools for matching your outfit? Or is it to hide something? Something you don't want anyone to see?

It's pretty. We like the look of it. All the multiple color choices, elude to the personalities they represent. Why do we need color to represent our personalities? Maybe it's the fact It can't represent itself just as connecting concepts in writing can't connect with out a metaphor, nail polish is a form of communication through an external channel.

Dancing is a dream reality

Dancing is a Dream Reality.

When I think of dreams I think of a beautiful sunset, or some happy thing I've always wanted. Dreams are just that, made up, not real. Dreams are your mind supplying the need for happiness that society as a whole can't give you. You look at the happiest man alive, and they will have no dreams? or will they still be wanting more?

Dancing is a Dream Reality?

Can you dream awake? With out even realizing it, we dream all day long. Day-dreaming. Dreaming of what we wish our future will hold, reading a fortune cookie, fantasizing a million dollar jackpot win. These are all made up realities of what we really want.

So is it safe to say that Dreaming is wanting what you don't have? The problem is, when we dream asleep, we some times dream of death.

Alas, the word Dream now has two very distinct meanings. A mind induced persona during the shallow stages of sleep. And the desire for what we don't have but desperately want both awake and during sleep.

Some times these two ideal definitions cross. When they do, some people can make their wildest dreams come true. Really get into what their heart desires, for some, this could be flying as high as an airplane like a witch with a broom would, except arms spread and legs straight back.

Dancing is a Dream Reality!

When I say Dream Reality, I mean what? We know what Dream means now, and Reality is the state of being real, or tangible. (reachable more or less) So I am simply put, making my Dreams come true.

The word A is a very informative word. It describes in one letter, that the described is one, or single. A can mean  "one example of". Substitute "one example of" with A and you get:

Dancing is One Example of Dream Reality.

Dance. Movement. Instantaneous change in motion. The curves of your body extenuated and then retracted in the rhythm. Free of all judgment, release of tension, and the will of  it all forms what people like to see. The attract-ability that comes from your movements is fuel to the watchful eyes of onlookers. I'd almost call it a drug, at least for me.

Dancing is a Dream Reality.

What happens to someone when...

In this blog, I'm going to throw some hypothetical questions out to my viewers. These questions are ment to make you think about your response, what is socially acceptable, and what I think.

1. What happens when you drink wine every day?

Your response- ??
Socially Acceptable- you don't drink wine every day!
To me- you become a new drunk human being

2. How many days can you go on 6 or less hours of sleep a night?

Your response- ??
Socially Acceptable-We go to bed for more than 8 hours a night, only one day in a row can it be less
To me- going on 7 days.

3. How many classes can you miss in one week?

Your response- ??
Socially Acceptable- You don't miss class unless you are almost deathly ill.
To me- as many as I can afford

4. How many meals should you eat in one day?

Your response- ??
Socially Acceptable- 3 solid meals
To me- as many as I want, usually 2

Now that you all think I'm nuts, we all have our own way of looking at things, but as a society,there is a standard. The standard is set pretty high on most questions like these, because most of us couldn't reach these goals that society sets for us.

Happiness is a State of being Healthy

When you are happy, you can smile. You smile with such a smile that no matter how much bad is in front of you, you will still smile, because you are internally happy, not just satisfied at the surface. You can smile as your car is being towed. You are happy. BUT, if you can laugh at a bad joke, you are internally happy.

If I pass you and smile will you start to smile? The strength of my happiness is so great that it will rub off onto the surface, even for a split second, of others. If you feel like you're a light house because you are lit up, you're internally happy. If you have a "cheezy as Hell" smile on your face, you are internally happy. :)

Happy, what does it take to be "internally happy?" Honestly, it takes what makes you happy. Lucky for the world, this could come from multitude of sources. I happen to find a deep connection with one person to be my internal happiness source.

It takes internal happiness to make you healthier... you move with greater purpose, get the spark that you may or may not have ever even experienced...

Random

What's to be said? My words don't do anything for me. They don't clean my car, or wash it. They don't fill out Fafsa. They don't read, or wash my clothes. there is only one purpose for words, to communicate. If you don't have anything to say, don't speak.

I know what I'm going to talk about. I am going to talk about pointless items in the everyday life. Pictures, plants, Facebook, and shot glasses.

Now I want to mention things that you can't live with out for a day. Cell Phone, planner, wallet, and Clothes.

English Paper's and Class Confusion

Today I presented what to me seemed like a really thought out, detailed, analysis description of all the different aspects of both my grandmother's roaster, and the great things it can tell us about my family. Instead of being professional learners and higher level thinkers (which is what college students are?) my experience was washed away by the over thought process of my writing. Apparently I think too hard, to put it in class terms.

Why is it that when I have a great idea, and a great thesis, my underlying message is overlooked? We are forced to read countless books and search between the lines to find the message School book author's leave, why does my paper have to be cut and dry? My goal as a writer is to keep you wondering. What did I mean when I was describing "It"? Was I talking about the roaster? or was I talking about memories? Was I talking about the intricate details of the flaws of my life? or was I pointing out the faded color?

These details drive the argument which is the whole purpose of hitting a key is it not?

Now I understand this is a draft, and I know that my analysis paragraph is yet to be present, but without the current synopsis, my paper wouldn't get to my thesis.

Bloggs On Blogger.com

I've read a few other people's blogs on blogger.com and other blogging sites. The purpose for blogging? I've found many different blog topics, subjects, and opinions thereof, but what I've found is that people are always saying what they believe and how they see things.

I see blogging as a way of expression, think of it as a painting. Some people will gaze at it, and love it, others will gaze and grimace. I blog to express... whether they want it or not. I don't mind grimaces. I would love to be called a genius by a few, but I believe the judging is out of my hands.

I also see blogs as a look in the eye of the writer... how he or she thinks. the vast processes that come from one person can express a lot about that person. How he or she files thoughts, thinks actions, or relays that information here for me to read is incredible in its self.

Whether you write on age, Physics, rockets, magic, harry potter, gaming, or books, you write with the purpose of informing, teaching, learning, engaging, or inspiring. We write like we do everything else, we need to, or we wouldn't.

I write today, why? to fill a requirement? to inform? enlighten? Engage? In much writing, this question is underlying and is often looked too deep, or too shallow, but if they don't come out and tell you what they are writing about, or for, it's often left to the reader, which is what can make a great writer, and intreague the reader.

<This could quite possibly be the thing we kept hitting around in class.>

College Life

OH MY GOSH,

Why in goodness name does every class assume that they are the only one your taking? Seriously, I have a 15 credit hour work week, and if I do as suggested, I could spend 16 hours on home work alone...

this only adds up to only 31 hours, but still, life is crazy.

Being sick the past couple days, I've been on a freeze. I feel like I can't move to even hit the snooze, and had not some miracle woke me up this morning, I would have made this work week about 11 credit hours.

When I can usually walk to class in 10-20min at the most, it took me closer to 30-45 for the past two days, this becomes disturbing to me. I start to wonder if Death swarmed me over...

We all have those days... you know when you just want to sleep, never move till man you could have fun by getting up...

Today wasn't one of those

World of Love

Love, what exactly does love mean? When does compassion in any form cross the line of romance? How do you know when to say "I love you"?

Some how I used to be the person that they told, "don't say I love you, it's over used." I am a hopeless romantic searching for that one person who will hold me and I will know that they mean it when they say "I'm forever your's."

But I've never gotten the whole "DATING", honestly after about a month, you know this person like the back of your hand because you've analyzed them like your wife. (every guy marries his left hand at birth.) You can make all the right moves and all the right actions, you can wait hours by your phone, waiting on that txt... but when it comes to push and shove, "You were only dating" and half the time they fade out of your mind because you either get sick of waiting and forget, or you badger them till they tell you to f#%$ off...

I find myself pushing through this phase, I don't like lingering here... I don't want to be that person who spends their life with someone and they never get with you because you find that they have 5 or 6 other boy friends... and when I say boy friends here, I mean boys who are their friends who they are "dating" but not boyfriend and girlfriend.... O no, "we're not together" RIGHT, I mean we're ONLY DATING...

Or, what I call people, Playing the Field...

So I go back to my original comments,

Love, what exactly does love mean? When does compassion in any form cross the line of romance? How do you know when to say "I love you"?

I see love as a form of communication... be it sexual, verbal, or spiritual, I see love as two people showing in some form how much they mean to one another.

You can buy your girlfriend a necklace, but unless you put love in it just as preachers place the word of god upon you, you have to put the word of love upon that person, and in this case through the necklace, it holds NO LOVE... It's challenging thinking of a loving way to bistow the power of love upon it, but for us romantics, it comes naturally.

Life of a Physics student

Although I have only just started my journey through Physics 102, I know that this class will be very interesting. You don't have to know Newton's laws of Physics to know that books bought from the school are outrageously priced... Some how I bought my used book for ~$95 USD, but could have bought the same thing from Amazon.com {http://www.amazon.com/} for ~$45-50 USD. Don't believe me, check yourself.

From the get-go, my class has been interesting, we completed our first "ICW". Giggles, don't I feel like I should be attending Hogwarts from Harry Potter with their "OWL's"? This ICW stands for "In Class Work". Having a packet of paperwork that was 5 pages long on the first day, it felt like I should be hit with a spell just to get over the aggravation of the man moving across the screen trying to obtain perfect zero acceleration, which with human error is literally impossible using a mouse.

Which you can only obtain zero acceleration two ways:
1. you aren't moving at all.
2. you have reached a velocity that remains contant over a period of time.

With the mouse picking up every little motion, the man changes direction of travel and rate of speed quicker than someone having a seizure, it was impossible to achieve for any real measurable length of time, [atleast not one I want to calculate. XD]

*A "PCW" is Pre- Class Work, what is known by every other society thinking human-being as Homework.

The "PCW" I finished tonight was over the first chapter from my overly priced book, that crammed a whole semester of High School Physics AP into about 7 Pages.